Saturday, July 19, 2014

COMMENT MODERATION BACK ON

Many of you have noticed that we turned comment moderation back on.  It's not something we did because of spam.  We've moderated older comments for a while now because that's where the spammers usually hit most often.  But current comments on recents posts were not moderated.  Until now.  

No, the reason we did this was because of a couple of hateful comments that someone tried to slip through.  I caught them before they posted.  I won't reprint the threatening slur the person used in their 'name', except to say that it involved bodily harm and the "F word gay slur".  One of the notes asked "How do you live with yourselves?  Disgusting."

I wanted to post it and then reply, "just fine actually...we have a home in the city and a home in the country and we are on a journey to self sufficiency for our retirement...thanks for asking.  And you?"  Of course they call that "feeding the trolls" in online parlance, so I didn't allow the comments to appear.


We've been lucky so far.  We have had this blog going strong now for three years and never once heard a negative word.  Instead, we have 480 (and counting) new friends, plus lots of others that comment daily or occasionally or both, and countless more that just pop in to read but don't comment.  Many of you I have come to know through personal emails back and forth off the blog and we consider all of you dear friends.  To be honest, we just don't have time for hate.

We don't even like to watch the news now.  It's all politicians and political parties hating each other.  People hating each other.  Faiths hating each other.  Countries hating each other.  Can't the world just love?  Is that too pie in the sky?  Are my rose colored glasses too big?  Is that really too much to ask for?

The least I can do is make sure this blog has no room for hate and that's what I've done.  So for now, all comments will be moderated so that I don't have to expose all of you to that either.  When you post a comment, nothing will change except that it won't appear instantly.  But don't let that worry you, it will appear as quickly as possible via my computer or phone or tablet.  I didn't really want to bring all of this up here, but we've always said the blog will share the good and the bad.  Fire ants, snakes, garden fails, droughts or heavy rains, plans we didn't get to, those are the bad we expected.

Today we are off to the farm to enjoy our time away from news and negativity.  Hope you all have a great one!
Updates of course throughout the weekend.


Oh, and how do we live with ourselves?
Fine...just fine...life is good!


50 comments:

dianefaith said...

Beautifully written. It's people with positive, loving lives like yours and 2nd man's that make me feel better about the world.

kristine barr said...

What a shame that these things need to be done.

Myrna said...

Good for you. Enjoy life and just ignore the nasties out there. Lots of nice folks and they outweigh the bad.

Dawn McHugh said...

The phrase
If you cant say anything nice the dont say anthing at all.
comes to mind :-)

Jane and Chris said...

Sending love...just because.
Jane x

jessie said...

Sorry to hear you've been dealing with this junk. Thanks for sharing your stories of the farm and your family! I enjoy reading your blog and am so glad I found it!

John Gray said...

I have no moderation on my blog so send the bastards around to GOING GENTLY if they want a bitch fight!
I am on night shift tonight so I am ready to roll my sleeves up
Xxxx

Rachel @ Grow a Good Life said...

What is wrong with people?! I say that often then try to focus on the positive rather than the negative. I hope you have a wonderful weekend at the farm.

Ranni Moonbeam said...

Very well written! We need more people to believe, to feel, exactly what you've just said. Makes life so much more. (hugs) (If this is a second comment I apologize. I was typing this up the first time and may have hit "Publish" by mistake.)

Teresa Ashby said...

I love visiting your uplifting and peaceful blog - you're absolutely right to shut out the nasty people xx

Peg said...

I agree wholeheartedly. I'm a 'news junkie'. My dad loved to read the newspaper from cover to cover and when we got a TV that had a news report he never missed it. I was raised that way and always loved to read the paper and listen to the hourly news on the radio, and watch news on TV. I wanted to be informed. Not so much any more. It does seem as if the only news is bad news, really bad news. I'm not a religious person, but a person of great faith and I know that God is love; the bible tells me so. And we should all try to love one another and get along. I found your blog by reading comments on another blog and following the link. I thoroughly enjoy it and went back to the beginning so I could follow your journey to retirement.

jaz@octoberfarm said...

little people with little minds. sorry you had to go through that. people can be such a**holes! why not just keep their men feelings to themselves. i love your blog and you two are so cool.

It's Just Dottie said...

My girls tell me I live in a fairy tale and I need to live in the real world.. Well I am real and.I want to live a beautiful life everyday, With God and friends like you on my side I know I can....

Marcia said...

Sorry to hear about the slurs. I wondered about your comment moderation and why. I too have tried to wean myself from the news. It's very depressing and good news is rarely reported. I used to listen to NPR and Diane Rehm faithfully everyday but even that has gotten depressing. Keep ding what you are doing on this blog. It's working for me. I read your every post.

kymber said...

1st and 2nd Man - as crazy as it sounds - there are haters out there! imagine? because people like you and 2nd Man, and your blog readers and your friends and your commenters CHOOSE blogs that are uplifting and choose to blog in a positive way about successes and failures - it will always bring out a hater. i am daftly surprised that this is your first time needing to moderate - but all that says to me is that the haters and the trolls are on the losing side. your blog is brilliant, wonderful and loving - that's why people come here! there will always be haters who hate beauty and love - but we will always keep beating them down! whatever else was said to you - brush it off. if it feels like it is sticking to you - print their comment(s) and then have a little fireside party at the farm and make sure to melt some marshmallows over their stupid, hateful and cruel words. you have many who love the 2 of you and many who support this positive, uplifting and inspiring blog.

i am glad that you took the high road. love to both of you! your friends,
kymber and jambaloney

Tewshooz said...

There will always be troublemakers and haters. That is who they are and they love it. Ignore them.

Joani said...

something I learned as a child!

Joani said...

It takes all kinds to make the world go round. Am so sorry that this has happened to you and yours. I don't know why we can't all live in a peaceful world but that ain't happening. Have a great weekend.

Tombstone Livestock said...

Sorry some people cannot keep their opinions to themselves, to bad there is not an option to block words like there is on email to dump imto a spam folder. Take care.

belleau kitchen said...

The haters will always hate but you're right to turn the moderation on. You don't need to read it. Sending much gay love from over the ocean xx

jaz@octoberfarm said...

their MEAN feelings...god i need to teach myself to proof read.

Practical Parsimony said...

I am so sorry for the ignorance in the world and the way it finds people who are doing no harm to anyone. The commenter must have a bad life. I hate strife. That is why I got rid of part of AT&T and am working on the rest! Have a pleasant day on the farm.

Joleen said...

Peace and love to you always.

FionaG said...

There is so much intolerance and ignorance in the world. I don't understand why people find acceptance of difference so hard, it's the differences that make people interesting. Sorry you were exposed to such comments and thank you for shielding us from them. A part of me things you should have let them through just to see the comments that followed from your readers. I know the support for you would have been overwhelming. Perhaps one day we will have a 'Star Trek' future of tolerance, acceptance, unity and peace.

Brisbane Girl said...

I'm really sorry that you have been subjected to that treatment, I follow your blog because you are kind, happy, beautiful souls, who are happy with life, living your dream and sharing that with the global community. I agree on more love less hate. Just keep on doing what you are doing, because its perfect! I hope you have a lovely relaxing day at the farm x

MaryJo said...

Why can't these people get a life.
That is a lovely post you have written & continue to live your charmed life.

Moonwaves said...

There are some things I will just never comprehend - I don't know how people can be like that. If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all is right. That was one of my mum's oft-used expressions. Right up there with two wrongs don't make a right. So sorry you've been subjected to that.
Hope you're having a wonderful weekend regardless.

Texan said...

Can't the world just love... if only sighhh... how wonderful it would be :O)

wendywoo said...

Love your blog, love your attitude about life, don't let the turkeys get you down!

Texas Rose said...

Your blog is a ray of sunshine in a sometimes gray and discouraging, even mean, world. That’s why I love it so much.
I believe whatever one puts out into the world comes back to them - positive and light brings in more good, and negative brings in the opposite. Thank you guys for your wonderful light-filled blog. It’s soul-food for my heart!

Daphne Gould said...

If everyone went for love instead of hate the world would be a much better place.

brenda karason said...

I thank you 4 ur blog-my husband n I r going 2 b homesteading n 2 yrs-Tenn-u guys r very fresh-not heavy-keep it going-we love u =0)

Donna OShaughnessy said...

Great post, great words, great blog you're great guys and this Midlife Farmwife loves you! Carry on.

Fee said...

Hi guys!

It's such a shame that you need to have comment moderation on your blog. It's really sad that too many people feel the need to spread their hateful thoughts rather than be mellowed by the love and beauty around them, as shown on your blog.

Keep up the good work, I really enjoy receiving all your missives in my inbox!

Take care,
Fee.

Patricia Schwencke Forsythe said...

Must send a comment of support and let you know that I've enjoyed your blog for a long while now. Don't let the few haters get you down, we love your positive outlook on life and since I'm here in Texas, too, I enjoy reading about gardeners who are dealing with the same things I do here in the Texas hill country. It's not like gardening anywhere else in the world.

Mary said...

Sorry, we are taught as children " be nice", why have some forgotten? Rodney King said" can't we all just get along".

Kev Alviti said...

Good on you! I love this blog and think both of you live a great life. I'm glad it hasn't got you down too much. Keep up the gteat poats and all the work you do on your farm. Kev

crazymimi said...

Never understood why people have to say hateful things, they should just move on and follow other blogs! I enjoy your posts.

Meg said...

Very sorry that you're receiving some hate. Try not to let it bother you - it's just a reflection of their insecurities and really has nothing to do with you.

Your blog is lovely - I look forward to reading it daily.

Ann said...

Hey 1st Man,

Just read this post today and wanted to share the love with you. <3 LGBT folk are just like any other group...some of them suck (not in a good way) and some are brilliant. As a member of the family myself, I have been privileged to know many of the brilliant sort...I would count you boys among them.

XOXOXOXO,

Ann

Leigh said...

I was scrolling through the lovely photos in your "Weekend Update" post, got to the end where you mentioned Saturday's post, so I had to come see. I'm so sorry you had to be attacked like that. Hateful comments are so mean and cowardly. I get them from time to time about our animals and they're always annoying.

Sandy said...

1st Man,
I've received comments, and have pretty much block those people.
It's very annoying, stand your ground with using the moderation.........they'll get the message.

Alison said...

You and 2nd man are such amazing and lovely people and I love you both very much. That you take hate and turn it into love is refreshing. The outpouring of love from all of your followers is a blessing to see. Thank you.

Practical Parsimony said...

I have wondered for over 50 years why anyone cares who another loves. If you are happy, then I am happy.

aysablue1 said...

I just adore your blog, I can't understand why people have to be so hateful. Perhaps they are jealous of the wonderful life you are making on your little farm. Rock on and don't ever let small-minded people get you down. You guys are awesome. I look very forward to your posts daily and am thankful that you share all your adventures. Peace.

Galestorm said...

So very well said! I have followed bloggers that had to do the same and some went private. It's very sad. I believe if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all. I just don't understand the war mongers and the biased among us, as well as all the politicians acting like a bunch of kids in kindergarden!! I do not know you personally, but just from your blog I know that you are a kind person with a good heart. I would love for you and 2nd Man to be my neighbors!!

Tonya @ My Cozy Little Farmhouse said...

Sending love your way, my dear friends!

SkippyMom said...

This distresses me to no end. That people think it is okay to hate others because they don't like/agree with/approve of whatever.
I am not a fan of comment moderation, and it's sad it has to exist - but exist it does and for very good reason.
Please know that there are so many friends out here in blogland that love and admire you - and the trolls are just that, trolls. I actually feel sorry for them - to live with so much hate and vile in their hearts. I know I wouldn't want to live that way.

You take care, and never forget - we ALWAYS have your back. Just whistle ::wink:: and know I will be here. Hugs and love to you both!

Beverly Miller said...

I've been lurking your blog since the beginning and I absolutely love it ! I'm with you- I watch so little TV because of all the hate it's even leaking into Facebook and Twitter and other social media sites. Just know that there's lots of us who love you and love your blog .

1st Man said...

I didn't reply to all the comments because we were so touched and just wanted to give a blanket thank you to everyone for being so kind.

Since this is a new comment on the post, I will take this moment to thank everyone above for the amazing words.

And Beverly, thank you for popping up to give words of support. You are right, the hate seems to be seeping into Facebook and Twitter. The sad thing is when you have friends that re-post things that are on the hateful side and they may not even realize it (or maybe they do, and their true feelings come out, ha).

Thank you again for the support!!!